Burnout

Takedown is a Classic, Legends Holds my Heart, but Paradise is Otherworldly

I haven’t shared any of my writing since February. Aside from listening to endless amounts of music, the second half of the school year, graduate school, and maintaining relationships and musical endeavors, the gloom of a seemingly never-ending New York winter led to my needing a break from sharing myself on the internet. That break became an extended hiatus, and I’m glad to have taken it.

Shout out to my pal Tom for introducing me to this series. We should get a beer.

I would not call it writer’s block. Rather writing did not hold the priority that I wish I had made it. When I was in high school and college, and a grade haunted me, writing came easily. There is no accountability but my ego for my own writing nowadays. That needed to change. My accountability has become that I love writing and I need to do it regularly to be my most authentic self. I am glad to report this process is making terrific progress.

(Now that I sit with it, I realize I need to make a more concerted effort to encourage my students to write for themselves and not for a grade. Making a practice is more important than polishing a product, and I have not done my best to ensure that value is emphasized for my students. That sucks for them this year: they just got another project.)

This was the first game I played once the emulators hit iOS. Playing this on my phone brought back all those hours I put in on my PSP way back when.

That’s not to say I haven’t been writing. In this interim I finished my first short piece of fiction in years, wrote and composed the third After School Special song, and journaled endlessly. I took the time to fall in love with the practice of putting my thoughts onto paper before advertising whatever brand I have to share. If others are interested, great; help me make a living, and I’ll do it more regularly. If not, I share my words when I share them, and I accept that with grace and compassion for myself.

Will I ever be as happy as I was the summer I first played this?

Speaking of which, I want to make posting here more of a practice and less of a product. I have been too concerned with polishing that I become stuck before sharing anything I deem “worth” sharing. This perfectionism is silly and based in fear, one which will leave me only immobilized, one that I will combat by doing the damn thing.

I’ve been listening to a lot of great music, watching a ton of awesome films, and reading fantastic comics and books. Talk soon about them, and more.